Children Leaving For Camp Gifts

Hi! You guys going away this summer? No. Too bad. A change of scenery is good. We're on vacation now. Oh, I forgot. Your kids are gone for the week. Peace in our lifetimes.

'What's that? It's a leaving present for the next person who comes in late.'

Support Group for a Good Problem

I have an idea - Let's sit around the campfire and watch scary movies on our iPads!

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"All right, boys, we're had our fun."

Building a Shelter

"It takes a few days for them to detox from screens."

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

"The house doesn't seem big because the kids are gone - it seems big because we've shrunk so much."

'Okay guys - lights out!'

'Aren't these marshmallows just going to make us plumper for when the bears ultimately eat us?'

"But Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

"Sure, this camp has swimming, games, fishing, horseback riding and rock climbing. But, does it have Wi-Fi?"

I think it's time he left home.'

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

Remember to lash from the outside!

'I'm not riding with her and that jar of creepy crawlers!!'

A caveman kid sees his ancestor in a museum exhibit

"Well that's the last of our offspring gone - let battle commence."

GPS verses Map and Compass - Lost or Found?

'The children are leaving the nest, honey! They're not diving in the Olympics...That was at leas a 6.5 by the way.'

'The 'most improved player of the year award' or the 'you don't suck as much as you did last year award' goes to...'

"I think we should give day camp a chance, Adrian. Let's not become prisoners of our own dogma."

'Yes, I'm proud to say all my kids went into boot camp as soon as they left home.'

Nobody likes a smore loser

"This camp had better have a power port!"

'They're 'individual' cheese slices, Herb, We knew one day they would go out on their own,'

"I suppose it's 'Empty Nest Syndrome', doctor. . . ever since Amber left for college I've felt so empty!"

"I'll make a deal with you! If you stop singing Row, Row, Row Your Boat, I'll help you finish your requirements!"

"Kids in college? Well, won't it be nice to have them home?"

Letter from Camp* (*with Footnotes)

With their only child off to college, the Gilmonts each suffered empty-nest syndrome in their own way.

"The computers are down. You'll just have to suffer and go outside and play."