Childproofing Pillows

"I think he's outgrown the baby gate."

Interior design trends for parents....

A young Don King

Well, we thought we had childproofed the house

"My plan is to figure out child-proof caps, then move right into hacking."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Pool attached to child's bed.

"Does knowing you're being watched on a baby monitor keep you out of mischief?"

At the rock concert...

Child about to jump off ironing board into bath.

Child using building blocks to get over a baby gate.

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Sitting Up'

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

'News headline: Britain unsafe to bring up young children.'

'At midnight, we go over the wall.'

"Who says you can't take it with you? This one has a fireproof lining."

'They made it like that so the kids wouldn't bother you.'

STRIP *Community Care * Squeezing it all in before lunch

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

"Trust me, with me in charge, your kid will behave and be safe..."

Beware of teething baby.

Mobile phone damage to children.

"The Johnsons finally get around to child-proofing their home."

Violence against children.

Sharon Shoesmith unlawfully sacked.

'He swallowed a warning label!'

A musical instrument shop is positioned next to a silent treatment shop.

'Is your house baby-proofed?'

'Well those stair gates were a complete waste of money'

Code Red!

"Why are you playing hide-and-seek in the stove!?! Don't shush me! This is my stove!"

Health and Safety Gone Mad - "It doesn't look safe, his face is totally exposed to danger."

'It's amazing what they let that kid get away with.'

Child Abuse Report

"Mom is an ER nurse."