Childlike Humor Enthusiast Gifts

"He's very advanced for his age"

'Play post office? -- I don't like violent games.'

'Let's play doctor - I'll listen to your heart and you give me all your allowance.'

"If your dad is truly the King of the Jungle, why can't you ask him to abolish school?"

'Who ever came up with the idea that throwing up is fun?'

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

Funky Facts: Elephants.

"No. 3 step forward and whine, 'Please, Mom, I'm forty-four years old—I can tie my own tie.'"

'She said she was made out of sugar and spice, so I bit her.'

Boy who has eaten oysters and grown fat

"The kids told me it was a magic wand."

'Boy squeezing a spot at boy squirting silly string'

"Meet your new baby brother! We decided to upgrade."

"There's definitely enough growing room."

'You think you need WHAT glands expressed?'

"I'm worried about him - he's praying to Mrs. Butterworth."

'I had a good share and tell, Ms. Gibbs, but my family made me sign a confidentiality agreement.'

'I thought you were supposed to spend green stuff.'

'I need a haircut...maybe I should enlist.'

'Did you hear about the fool who goes around saying no all the time?'

Pediatrics - Anatomy

"Gee, Mom, these people don't make ME sick."

'I'll take Tommy Peters to cry first, for a nickel.'

'You gotta try different things! Sometimes a temper tantrum works best an' somethimes sulking an' sometimes not eating!'

'Oh, I know that broccoli is good for me -- it's just that I don't feel I deserve it.'

Cheeky Girl

'Miss Myers! - Billy ate all my paste!'

Lemon Grizzle Cake

"That growth spurt I was waiting for didn't quite turn out the way I'd hoped."

"Typical teenager-straight for the burger bar."

A.B.C. Mail

Fat Kid 20- Thinks he has found a spare head

'Has he taken my chocolates?'

"Reading, writing, AND arithmetic - I'm too YOUNG to multitask!"