Childlike Conversationalists Pillows

"So, what do you do for play?"

"First, I sent a rocket of a drive down the fairway, then I took the 7-iron, put that ball on the green...a hundred and eighty yards if it was an inch..."

Pet Shop - Parrot labeled as 'Good Listener'

'That's the corkage fee you wanted to ask about, Jack, not the cleavage fee!'

Remember my mum? I took that photo a week before she died. There's one of me...that was a good haircut.

Kid to kid: 'I can't be wearing out my welcome. I didn't even step on it.'

'Casual Friday's never caught on in this department.'

"Tell me about yourself. Any weird genes or anything?"

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

Student: 'Is the medical marijuana thing a grass-roots movement?'

Imaginary boyfriends are best.

'Well - how has everyone wasted time and energy today?'

'You're lucky you're just a kid and don't have to worry about things like going out and getting a job when you're supposed to be retired.'

'Fancy a good time - no strings attached?'

"Gracie, you're a good mud artist."

'No talking' sign at a fishing site.

Nice Old Ladies Tend to Look at the Bright Side of Things: 'As kids my brother and I took turns beating each other up!' 'Well, I think it's wonderful when kids take turns!'

'If you'll excuse me, I'm going to work the room.'

'Let me go over your symptoms again; you have a 'gugu' and you're feeling a little 'bugaga'.'

'Great lunch box.'

'We're rich! We're rich! My mum's got goldstones!'

"The hardest thing I've ever done as a homing pigeon was to leave home, but you see, I really wanted to travel and see the world..."

Not quite Beverly Hills.

'And he's so-o-o-o knowledgeable about wine. He must have spent an hour telling me about his trip to Chardonnary.'

"Phil is my Vice President in Charge of Snappy Comebacks."

'I take after my Daddy - He's a confirmed batchelor!'

"What can I say: It's nice to get away from the kids once in a while..."

"You haven't had sex since 1959? You shouldn't complain - it's only ten past eight now..."

"What is it about us that makes only crazy people want to talk to us?"

"Behold, as I guide our conversation to my narrow area of expertise."

"Not to be a killjoy, but this happened on our property. Are liable?"

"Do you play?"