Childhood Myth Enthusiast Gifts

'Any chance of getting a financial advance on my loose tooth?'

"Sit tight, kid! You'll get your tooth money. Just as soon as we settle who had dibs."

California Tooth fairy: 'IOU'.

"You know if I've been naughty or nice? Do you have my phone tapped?

"Old age is tough. Granddad lost a tooth but instead of money from the tooth fairy all he got was a bill from the dentist."

Shepherd and eurydice

King Arthur on the lake trying to open letters when the lady of the lake offers a letter opener.

"The water changes them back into babies. I think they call it the Fountain of Youth."

Couple looking at the statue of Eros by moonlight.

"Great cruise except the zip lining got flooded."

A newborn parachutes to safety after the stork carrying him gets hit by a plane.

Vlad the Impala

Venus

"You do realize his ‘nose so bright’ is going to attract a horde of Defense Department drones."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

Lady of the bath...

Here be dragons.

"Did you remember to back up the last 4.5 billion years?"

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Archimedes helps Sisyphus

Wotan with eye patch

"How was I supposed to know that the apple was a controlled substance?"

Warrior Woman

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

"I think someone's trying to play games with us."

"Sorry lad, ye can't be having' me pot o' toilet paper."

"Bigfoot"

'...this is Loch Lomand!'

"It isn't much of a dragon, but then, she wasn't much of a maiden."

A man sees Zeus throwing lightning bolts on the balcony of his apartment.

'Let's have some fun... give Eve extra memory.'

"...You talking to me? Well, I'm the only one here... You talking to me?!" "Narcissus De Niro"

“...And on the ninth day God created mosquitoes, just to annoy the hell out of everyone.”

Neptune