Childhood Memory Pillows

'Do you do wedding receptions?'

"My 7-year-old face on a cross-country family road trip every time The Doors' 'Riders on the Storm' played on our car radio... There's a killer on the road. His brain is squirmin' like a toad... Take a long holiday. Let your children play. If you give this man a ride. Sweet family will die."

'Alice, what's the matter now?'

What you wanted to be for Halloween...What you were.

"I had a pet lobster once...until we got it home from the grocery store."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

"There was no other choice, Mom. It was a double dog dare."

"I don't know why you always have to choose the same hide-and-go-seek hiding spot that I do, Tommy!"

Haircuts

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

The Seven Dwarfs After Therapy

Bike Rides

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

Mother pours bubble bath into child's plastic pool

'Red rover, red rover, send Billy right over!'

Three kids in a trench coat, twenty years later.

Caution May Contain Nuts.

"And this little piggy went – whoa! Where is your fifth little piggy?!"

'My first camera'

'He can't be all bad if he still likes peanut butter.'

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

'Here comes the Papa-razzi again...'

Jack in the Box

"Frankly, Jackie Paper, I’ve done all I can with strings and sealing wax."

Tooth fairy

'I almost get out the door and then my mom yells...'Don't you know it's February?!' And here I am again...looking like an eskimo.'

'No fair. Someone ate the popsicle off the stick.'

"Trust me. This is going to make it easier to discuss your childhood."

"Next time make up your mind and just pick one!"

"There's no need to be em'bear'rassed about what you like!"

"Der, dad. . . it's wireless!"

'I thought you wanted him to have all the things you never had.'