Childhood Chaos Coordinator Gifts

'For heaven's sake, couldn't you have spelled it out?'

"I downloaded the Laugh Track app yo soften mom when I give her my lame excuse."

I've always wanted to quit while I was ahead but the opportunity never presented itself.

IN box...OUT is wastepaper basket on fire.

The Baby Walker

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

"Well, isn't that embarrassing."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

"Quick, start the car!"

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

"The meeting will come to order."

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

Here and There Trays

'They don't understand goo-goo-gah-gah. Dumb it down to WHAAAAAH!'

"Guys, can you use your Mommy-doesn't-want-to-know-I-exist voices?"

A Communal Breakfast for the Young

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

Why it's bad when home owners change their minds about the bathroom's location late in a building project.

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'You'll soon get the hang of it - then they'll change it.'

Mayhem, Inc. Part 29

'What has twelve legs and barks?'

Riding School Chaos

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Bears going water skiing.

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

"It's crazy here! They're all on recreational rugs."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"I've told you before one at each end!"

'Great Therapy!'

"Sir, your ducks, they are not in a row."

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

We're looking for someone who knows how to adapt, not adopt.

"But if I don't break stuff who will?"

"I thought it would be nice if we had a forum where we could get together and have screaming tantrums."