Childcare Innovator Gifts

'William, I've decided to go back to work so I can get a little rest during the day.'

'The child is very illogical'

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"I'm bored."

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

A Tit for Tat.

Fitness Programme for babies

"I never subscribed to Hobbes' state of nature theory until the night we left the kids without a sitter."

'So this is goodbye then!'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

"Having nannies really changes you."

'Honey, what's wrong?! Why are you crying?'

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

"Damn it, are we flying a spoonful of peas again?"

'The stuka brought you.'

'We need a new hot water bottle.'

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

Mother racing to work for a company with day care and a health club.

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

Beware of teething baby.

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'Next time your kid has a party, blow up the balloons with an airpump!'

'I haven't been campaigning for a creche all these years for nothing - you're going!'

"Being a mum is a full-time job."

"GP or chemist? To be on the safe side let's go to A and E."

"Where would young families be without grandparents as unpaid childminders?"

Mind them while I go shopping and I'll give you 50 bucks extra!

'When the bough broke, did the daycare center's insurance rates go up?'

'This is great. No dishes to wash!'

"We're still figuring out how to monetise him."

'Your little one is giving the sitter a big kiss-of life.'

Heimlich's Mother's Maneuvers

Women with her children of leashes passes dog walker with dogs so well trained they have no leashes.