Childcare Chaos Lover Gifts

A baby biting a boys wristwatch

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

"I'm bored."

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

'So this is goodbye then!'

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

Children's Nursery

Two children play with a pedal bin

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

'Next time your kid has a party, blow up the balloons with an airpump!'

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"Broken childcare promises make me mad."

'My first solids. Do breasts get jealous?'

'This is great. No dishes to wash!'

Working Mother

"They can't see you right now - would you like a bottle while you're waiting?"

"I take my babysitting job very seriously."

"I thought I told you two to stop horsing around in here."

'As a baby sitter, you shouldn't think of me as a bratty kid...think of me as a jobs creator!'

"I'd let her go, but she's so good with the kids."

Supermom meets her match - super kid.

"Your nanny is paid to be patient with you."

"The candy bar I bought got stuck, so Johnny tried to get it out. First he put his hand inside. . . then his arm. . . then. . ."

Different Perspectives on Childcare

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

'Home from work at last!!'

'My room's in a terrible state, Mum's just cleaned it.'

"I'm sixteen years old and have been a babysitter for the past six months!"