Childcare Chaos Lover Gifts

A baby biting a boys wristwatch

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

"Your children are adorable...and so shiny!" "Thanks. I them in dish detergent."

"I'm bored."

'Of course I put my kids first! Look at how much I pay the nanny!!'

'So this is goodbye then!'

"She was right -- Her teddy bear did squish your action figure!"

"Congratulations! It's a pain in the ass."

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

Two children play with a pedal bin

Children's Nursery

"I fell in the mud again. Maybe I need a stunt double."

'We've never had an accident - aside from three of our five kids.'

"Can't you just relax and enjoy my childhood."

'Next time your kid has a party, blow up the balloons with an airpump!'

'We are considering a nursery expansion.'

Baby with a full diaper 'Load Rage'

"Broken childcare promises make me mad."

'This is great. No dishes to wash!'

'My first solids. Do breasts get jealous?'

Working Mother

"They can't see you right now - would you like a bottle while you're waiting?"

"I thought I told you two to stop horsing around in here."

"I take my babysitting job very seriously."

Dr.Benjamin Spock

"Your nanny is paid to be patient with you."

"I'd let her go, but she's so good with the kids."

'As a baby sitter, you shouldn't think of me as a bratty kid...think of me as a jobs creator!'

Supermom meets her match - super kid.

'Mom! -- Jeffrey's having a wardrobe malfunction!'

"The candy bar I bought got stuck, so Johnny tried to get it out. First he put his hand inside. . . then his arm. . . then. . ."

Different Perspectives on Childcare

'Home from work at last!!'

'My room's in a terrible state, Mum's just cleaned it.'

"I'm sixteen years old and have been a babysitter for the past six months!"