Child's School Event T-Shirts

"My child's school is having an auction, so can your entire life come to a halt?"

Uncle demonstrating chemical experiments to children

"A student skipped a model U.N. meeting – now he's claiming diplomatic immunity."

Yearbook

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

Paul goes home for the holidays

'You must be Jimmy's father . . .'

'...that 12th piece of fudge I ate must have been bad.'

King of Music.

Now I'll open up the floor to questions and batsh*t crazy rants.

'Oh, Christ.'

'...Just because you hired me doesn't mean I have to entertain.'

'In a slight change to the programme, the second year jazz quartet aren't playing 'Hello Dolly'. They are however playing truant!'

"Yay! School is done!!"

Science fair judge sees flower pot broken on floor near sign saying 'gravity'.

'Oh, we don't actually teach math any more ? we found it was too hard on the kids' self-esteem.'

"When do the kids go back to school?" "Oh, I don't know... 8 days, 16 hours and 47 minutes... or so."

Prom Theme: Coronavirus

'An egg and spoon race! That's horrible!'

Science Fair: 'We need a new rule - all projects MUST be in a container!'

"Very effective talk on the power of non-verbal communication."

Giant cat at school open night.

'I don't think he'll be having a party next year - I heard his mother scream 'Never again'.'

"Give my kid a passing grade and you could be looking at many more nice apples."

"At last...after so many missed days...so many cruel days apart...we are together once again!"

"There's always one kid that spoils the class picture."

Bubblegum

Boy unwell from eating cake decorations

Children lining up for face-in-a-hole school photograph.

"Well, who's it from? I don't take blind submissions."

'Just a suggestion...have you ever thought of boosting attendance with a bobble-head day?'