Child Innovator Gifts

"Ok, Griffin — let him see Mom’s roast!"

"When I grow up, I'm writing the Great American App."

Jr. cloning kit

I'm Bored With Educational Toys

'I'm sure that you are highly qualified. It's just that we're not hiring anyone at the third grade level.'

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

'Our little guy is busy with homework, or if we're lucky, some sort of social network start-up.'

"I'm starting my own delivery service. Is there anything you want to borrow from my Dad?!"

"You were right. Building an online business empire is even more fun than playing games."

Mr. Defner's drive-in algebra class was retro cool, controversial and somewhat effective.

'You did help Junior with his science project.'

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"I hate negative numbers, and I'll stop at nothing to avoid them."

Technologies and distance classes

'This handheld computer is very useful for teaching. It displays my lesson plan, calander, key files, and an extensive menu of put-downs for hecklers and classroom clowns.'

"I believe that's a Montessori school."

Children's Imagination

A baby using a heavy duty drill

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

"We can speak freely now. I've encrypted the line."

"You're just gaming down there? Shouldn't you be issuing your first IPO for some billion dollar internet enterprise you've created?"

'They're relics of the many ancient civilization that have dwelled at Blisshaven.'

"Why are all of your answers so mechanical?"

"The treasury has hacked into his computer and asked for ideas to solve the deficit"

I don't get the 5 paragraph essay. Do and outline. Topic. 3 examples. Conclusion. Ok. " 5 Graf Essay Stinks." Click click click. "2 long." Tap tap tap. "2 boring." "2 over." "#5grafmustdie." Thanks, Nana. It's a breakthrough! The 5-paragraph tweet!

Daisy Diaper Service

'We need a new hot water bottle.'

"Forget the allowance. I'm getting more than I need from venture capital."

Child has practiced building sand castles in snow.

'I will now read the results of my experiments in fruit genetics. . .'

Dog Walker

Education Plan

'Let's put it this way, your Billy is the only kid in class without his own website,,,'

He wants to be a plastic surgeon when he grows up.

Baby using model construction system to retrieve jam.