Chewing Pillows

'Chew each bite ten times? †I'm a busy man!'

'A bone is a bone is a bone...'

"Chocolate? I can't be allergic to chocolate! I'm a kid, can't you say I'm allergic to spinach or broccoli?"

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Behold! As I transform this family size frozen lasagna into a meal for one."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"Couldn't you have just laughed instead of spelling 'LOL' in your alphabet soup?"

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

Rage.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Bowled over again!

The wonderful world of cheese.

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

'The following program is intended for beer bellied, sports crazed, couch potatoes!'

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

'Chocolate milk, carrot cake,candied yams...see, there's a solution to everything!'

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

Party Animals.

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.

'Still not ready to talk? Ok dip him again.'

Soup of the month.

'Not that sort of body building program!'

"I can't give you a prescription for milk and cookies."

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

"Don't tell me... you hired a professional decorator!"

"Tia Carmen, is it okay if my study group meets here tomorrow?"

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

"Actually, the district office is getting better results with a fresh garlic bagel."

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

"I never knew God was such a sports fan."