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Great Moments in Chess

'I keep forgetting. Is it the chicken bone or fish head that's the Black Knight?'

"I got super baked in the shire and accidentally recruited these four little weirdos for the most important mission of all time."

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

"Harry Potter and the People Who Care Way Too Much About Harry Potter"

Nerd tryouts.

'The cutbacks begin to affect wizards.'

'See how the fools flee when fantasy role-play is fantasy no longer!'

"This realm isn't big enough for both of our killer outfits."

"Fair's fair. I cooked the dinner, so you can clean the cauldron!"

'There are two types of alchemy - there's organic and there's inorganic.'

Fellow Sheep of the Ring

"Victims of out-sorcery."

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"What a load of hocus-pocus!"

Remember, honey, abracadabra doesn't work anymore. Now it's command, option, shift.

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

"We've waited twenty-five years to make this trip, and we're certainly not interested in getting there in any six and a half hours."

"I'm Todd, your waiter, and I'd like you to think our friendship is more than contextual."

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'

Merlin realizes too late that he shouldn't be hexing while driving.

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

'Keep it under you hat, but I want you to enrich some uranium.'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

'You know, on second thought, we just might have an opening.'

'What's the situation about new wands these days?' - 'You can't beat 'compare wands.com.'

"These LARPERS are a bit more subtle and reality-based."

'Have no fear - I'll have the project completed for you in no time.'

"I was thinking, maybe karate isn't for me. Tio Ruben was a golden glove boxer. Maybe I can take up boxing! You don't know anything about boxing, do you, Tia Carmen?"

"Wait. Let me have one more try."

"Of course you can't replicate my experiments. That's the beauty of them."

"It's baaaack!"