Chemical Conspirator T-Shirts

"I'm from the president's office. We want you to develop a truth drug."

Secret footage from Roswell, shows an alien and debris from a crashed UFO

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'Think, son! What was that formula you fed that tree?!'

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

'Well, we turned water into wine. Anyone remember how?'

'If this drilling goes on they are going to find my stash of Martian Dollars I buried as a hedge against inflation.'

"Are you going to the paper-shredding after?"

'I baked it especially for you.'

"If they figure out how to clone humans, we're screwed."

'We don't want your business; we just want the recipe.'

Billy strip: bed pan.

"After you read the menu, eat it."

'..And just how long have you two been secretly married?'

"...but you uncovered this cafe's secret conspiracy to addict us to over-caffeinated drinks."

'Admit it, Crawford, this fish was already dead when you caught it!'

"It's a lot easier to throw someone under the bus when you have the app."

'I can't believe you cooked this all by yourself...you must have had an accomplice!'

'Sign this non-disclosure agreement ? I'm going to use a secret recipe.'

'What choice do we have? She knows too much.'

Clearly, this pair were planning on getting up to something...

'I removed the sugar, artificial flavors, coloring, preservatives, and additives. Now the eight ounce box weighs four ounces.'

Translation: "Let's turn off the invisibility shield just long enough to freak 'em out."

Kekule was predestined

Observe, Prepare, Act

"It would be cool if we cooked up a couple of these at your place where nobody could see us."

ALLIED CHEMICAL PRODUCTS, INC., 'I'd like to transfer out of Research & Development for awhile.'

Methyl Iodide use.

"Here's some money and a passport. They'll be looking for you so head to to the border and good luck."

'.. and I would appreciate a MARZIPAN file in your next cake!'

Scientist

"Do you really expect the I.R.S. to believe in all your mileage deductions?"

They trained him to play dead. I think it's some sort of insurance scam!

"He's almost finished raking. Everyone jump in three... two... one..."

Evil Pusskins#4