Chef's Chuckle T-Shirts

'Uh-Oh... I better watch my legs! There comes a cook - o - dile!'

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Amy Sedaris

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

"Do we really need the interactive garbage disposer?"

'Needs more kale.'

"This IS a chicken fried steak!"

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

Three Pigs.

"I've been a chef for far too long...."

'The items with the little hearts will clog your arteries the fastest.'

'This mandarin chicken is delicious, Dad. It tastes like you bought it yourself.'

"Tonight I'm making spotted bass. Tomorrow night, spotted spaghetti."

"For supper tonight, we'll have pizza, and cold pizza for dessert."

Noodle exchange program.

Mixing Business and Pleasure

'I saw my trainer eating here, and that's good enough for me.'

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

'What do you mean, I get a reprieve from my wife's cooking? My wife is a cook here at the hospital.'

'Alphabet soup? -- oh, an intellectual, eh?'

"Tia Carmen, did you ever use a stool to cook?"

"So you hired them to do the tidying up?"

"I heard we're now legal in some states."

"Yes sir, this is half a steak. The guest who had it yesterday wasn't very hungry."

Boiling Point

"But we had stir-fry last night and the night before."

At The Skinny Customer Restaurant

"Richard's not a foodie - he's a boozie."

... Harold at the stomach pump.

Waiter says to customer: 'Yes sir, that is the seafood platter. If you wanted something on it you should have said.'

'Have you guys ever actually read the directions on a box of shake'n'bake?'

The Lunch Trough Restaurant

Police Crime Scene tin can.