Checkout Comedy Seeker Pillows

Checkouts: 10 Items or Less, Baskets Only and Shoplifters.

Clown on bike.

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

Golfer Shouts at Ball to Go Into Hole.

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

'But they told me to take her down to theatre...'

"Let's face it. The only play you've ever liked is 'Stop the World - I Want to Get Off.'"

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"My God!! - Those actors must all be really old by now...!"

Man see a sign on door of Clayton's Jokes & Gags Shopee - 'Please Use Second Door To The Right'

Knights of the bedside table.

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

Dedication to excellence....

'You can all relax and resume your game. The unattended bag discovered on the infield turned out to be the second base.'

Noah's ark, many lions

Zoo animals.

I'm starting to think our new hardwood floor is made of driftwood.

Only One Item or Fewer.

"What's the final episode of 'Seinfeld' about?""It's about nothing."

"Relax, folks! I’m a lawyer. I can always find loopholes!"

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

"Promise me that if I die first you won't eat me."

Just a little seasoning...

'We never had all these labour-saving devices in my young day!'

"They certainly are jolly creatures aren't they?"

"Aaaaugh! It's the Zombie Alpacalypse!"

"Hold on - I need to tell the credit card company I'm going on a trip."

"How come there's no feel-good performance art?"

"Excuse me, but have you ever thought of play the mandolin?"

'How did you arrive at this price?' - 'Our computer has a new random generator.'

'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'

Fishing.

Knights queue up to attempt to pull excalibur with a claw machine.

'But if you want the real lowdown, we'll need some of your DNA.'