Chatmaster T-Shirts

"My dream job would be to get paid for lolling around and chatting with my friends."

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

'That's not speaking, that's barking Try again'

Woman on the phone.

'Who's a pretty boy! Is that all you've got to say?'

Boys and Girls: Differences in Internet Surfing.

"You had too many characters in your last tweet."

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

The Art of Bantering!

'Hold on, there might be someone more interesting on the other line...'

"When I was young, we made statements using signs and marches!"

'Why am I feeling like this..?'

'As a teleworker Colin sometimes struggled against feelings of isolation.'

'Life! Give my conversation liiiife!'

'This beer is pale and tasteless.' 'Your glass is empty.'

'With three teenage daughters the phone never rings twice in this house!'

"I actually know more commands than I respond to."

Two workers chatting by vending machine: 'Who are you working on at the moment?'

"Watch out for Bernie...he's a man of few words but a lot of gestures."

'Fred is a social conservative -- he believes in slow food and heavy beer.'

'I'll be candid, Mr. Simmons. Yours is the worst case of sheer animal magnetism I've ever seen!'

Part two of the adult ed. class 'How to Impress Women.'

"You're not holding up your end of the conversation."

"Darling, I realised that you didn't like your dinner by the third sheet."

"With Gloria, it's in one ear and out the mouth."

"You were wonderful at the Gardners' last night, Fred, when you turned on the charm."

Loudspeaker announces fans' derogatory chant.

'You'll never win that contest -- you've never said anything in fifty words or less.'

Chatterbox Podium

"I'm not doing this if you're just coming keep disagreeing with me."

Black belt in gossiping.

My first name is 'sit' and my last name is 'stay'.'

Using its natural defences, the brown nose recluse, once again, escapes danger.