Chart-topper Chaser Gifts

'CD's: Manufactured pop groups as seen on tv!'

"Can you perform under pressure?"

Robert Smith

"There's no such thing as 'bad publicity'." "All traffic is good traffic."

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

News and Magazines. Celebrity gossip. Sports scandals. Political bickering. We're out of the "information age" and well into the "too much information age"!

Sales chart is buildings in background.

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

"I, TikTok."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"I always thought I'd be good at getting drunk and crying on camera for Bravo."

"Right, before we look at the covid figures for today, do we need another sheet of paper?"

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is, none of us will be alive then.'

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

ACME Balloon Company.

School Career Choices: Celebrity chef, celebrity gardener,celebrity plumber, celebrity vet, celebrity painter & decorator. . .

"We have a song, but neither of us can remember it."

"Yoo-hoo. Fifteen minutes of fame is about to start."

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

"My tweet about not caring about what is trending is now trending."

"I never dreamed I'd ever enjoy watching my figure this much."

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"Thank you, Harris - I get the picture."

'Perkins, you really know to suck the joy out of a 3rd quarter report.'

Kensington Fluffies

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

'And right here they merged...'

Greatest hits, Greatest Misses.

"Oh, I can't complain"