Channel Hopper Pillows

"He changed channels, listened...and his news bubble exploded!"

Magazine says 'TV: Includes all digital, cable and satellite listings.' Man says: I've just finished reading the TV guide and it's time for bed.'

'Stop! It's football season!!'

"I'm not the only one who hates you changing the channel every second. Now when you want to watch TV, the remote escapes."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

"This place has the best happy hour."

Club Antisocial

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

'It's nothing serious. Rest is the best cure for binge shopping.'

TV-Man

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

Stop! Stop what? Do not change the channel! Sex, death, harrowing footage of the most remarkable story you've ever seen, tattoos, rock-n-roll, action, action, action! It's all coming right up, right after this five second break for station identification. Five seconds ... You're watching Rock Television. And now back to our ... bored. Welcome to ABC. We've got thrills, action, more thrills ... Click. I've got your action right here. We've created a monster. Click click click click click cl-

"Well, at least it's an improvement from last night."

'You don't want weather? Not a problem! How about sports, or maybe a nice movie? We can do that! Just put that thing down and let's talk, OK?'

Alien uses astronaut's visor as TV to watch news.

"You know what they say, time flies when you're having rum!"

Rodin's Cloakroom Thief

"You sure you guys don't spike the coffee?"

'I'm going to have to give up drinking and drugs when I leave uni - to pay off my bank loan.'

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

There is no hurricane season in Aruba...

'Must be the lesser known Easter Egg Island.'

Excess Baggage: When you are on a cruise and they say the ship leaves at 5:30, they really mean the ship leaves at 5:30.

Nature Lovers

"You need to lose 20 cable channels."

'I grew sick of Madison Avenue,so I quit,bought the bar and never looked back.'

"Don't blame me, you're the one who suggested an island-hopping holiday!"

It's only a remote, dear...if you want better programs you will need a wand.

"I read 'Art News.'"

'Now ask yourself Gerald, do we really need ALL these channels?'

Next Round Indicator

Anyone would think it's Frieze week...

"It has great depth, realized with such a unique economy of paint application... yet, there remains a curious aura of drivel I can't dismiss."