Ceremony Goer Gifts

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

'She's a very protectice mother!' - Lifeguard at Christening/Baptism.

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

'He does.'

Pipe Smoker of the Year Awards.

A salute of scouts

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

'They call it the people dance.'

'Does my head look big in this?'

"Did you have to go on about his being 'officially unavailable' and 'defying the nature of his masculinity?"

"It's OK vicar, Nigel's just having one of his panic attacks."

'What, They're comfortable.'

'Charles Frederick and Camilla Gladys!'

The Maryland School of Art's Class of 1998 Celebrating This Week's Commencement With The Traditional Thesis Painting Toss.

Tribal masks.

Double Wedding

"You must forgive me, I seem to have misplaced my spectacles... Does the best man have the ring?"

"You said it—everybody heard you."

The wedding cake as Holy Sacrament.

"Just a moment, please. I would like my mother's maiden name included."

The most popular Sunday at St Clive's was always the annual 'Blessing of the Smartphones' service.

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice performing the duty of a Christian.

"You're not supposed to throw tinned rice!"

'And do you, grand marshal Froomkin, promise to always love a parade?'

'Tell me, Sadie -just how many times is it now that we have been gathered here today?'

'...I now pronounce you man and wife. You may assume the position.'

'Nobody really agrees about what marriage is these days, so I'll just say 'Yadda yadda yadda.''

'We sell gifts for people to give to graduates they know.'

Christening

'My graduation gown got lost at the cleaners. Think anyone will notice this Snuggie?'

Martin is much gratified by an imposing ceremony

Principal: 'Is THERE a DOCTORATE in the House?!'

"I couldn't find the giant scissors."