Celestial Watcher Gifts

Asteroid Trajectory Assessment.

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

'Slip Ahoy!'

"Something goes around something, but that's as far as I've got."

'I wish I was creative'

'Of course the Johnsons got the big cloud.'

'I'll come in as soon as I've seen the orbits of Venus.'

The 24-Hour Celebrities Doing Something Stupid Channel.

Astronaut grilling on the moon and watching his sausage fly.

"Last week, the orioles were passing out Baltimore catechisms. This week, it's the cardinals doing baptisms."

"When I was your age the Big Dipper was over THERE."

Crisis.

"Don't worry, Jules. It'll come up on your side of the house in just 12 hours."

'Peace on...peace on...good heavens! Where are we?!'

"Do you hear what I hear?"

'No, Brian, an asteroid impact would never take us by surprise like it did the dinosaurs because we're highly intelligent and they were very stupid and dull-witted.'

Voyeurs guide to the Cosmos (stars in the shape of a sexy woman).

You always keep the same face turned this way --- Don't you trust me?

Let me warn you, toots. Celebrity is like radioactivity: you start with a big bang, then comes years with a half-life of slow decay.

First space criminal investigation

Atlas juggling with the moon.

"Do you mind? Look what you made me do!"

"Nope. Still no intelligent life."

'wow, I can't believe we never noticed that!'

'When you've seen one star you've seen them all, but every episode of Bargain Hunt is different.'

Man covering one eye looking at the moon.

Astronomical observations.

'If mobile phones become too popular we'll have nowhere to sit !'

"Move along, people, there's nothing to see here."

The suite hereafter.

"Well, of course you feel like you are - We ARE all just going around in circles!"

"If we came here in a faster-than-light spaceship, shouldn't it be dark out?"

"It's nice when all the kids get together at Christmas, but..."

'You wouldn't believe what's happening in the rest of the world.'

"If owls are so smart, how come they don't already now who it is?"