Celestial Escapist T-Shirts

"Not now, Elaine—I'm on my man-cloud."

"We can see through the troposphere, stratosphere, mesosphere and into all those distant stars up there in outer space... truly remarkable, huh, girl?"

The Solar System (after deregulation)

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"What do I do to relieve stress? I meditate, about not working here."

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

Sally and Joe's relationship really worked. . . they each had the space to do their own thing.

Last Chance For Reality

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

God Plays Baseball with the Earth

Royalty, Episcopacy, and Law.

"Did no one tell you that at this time of year everybody flies south?"

'The last thing I said to him was: 'whatever you do, don't look at the sun through this thing'.'

'It's nothing personal, Donald; I just need more space.'

'You're so sophisticated and witty...and muscular...do you work out? Why, yes, I'd love to come back to your place.'

My dinner with Andromeda

Johannes Kepler

Oregon Eclipse Watching, August 21, 2017

"I suppose we could call it the doughnut asteroid..."

"Mr. Jenkins' idea of paradise is a never occupied loo, a big flat screen with hundreds of free sports channels and a fridge that always gets refilled with beer and pizza."

'Needless to say, discus-thrower Bill Nordlander went to college on a full athletic scholarship.'

"Not again!"

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

'...I think I found Ursa Major.'

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"I don't know—maybe we could look at something besides Canis Major tonight?"

"Yeah, it works, but you still shouldn't have forgotten the flag!"

Zoo Employees

"I've half a mind to protest."

FSBO Heaven

"Wow - you should've been out there! That meteor shower was spectacular!!"

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'