Celebrity Romantic Gifts

'My husband is an Astronomer: He treats me like a star...'

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: The Science of Love

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

'Look - a starfish, its manager, its agent, its minders, its significant other, its make-up artist, its personal trainer, its secretary, its astrologer, its feng shui consultant...'

The americanisation of vulture.

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

'Hi, my name is Bruce Wayne, but not THE Bruce Wayne!'

Meanwhile in Hollywood

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

Jack Gleeson

'Your place or mine?'

"This number goes out to all the little people I met on my way back down."

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Not now, my love. I'm feeling preminstrel."

"This may surprise some of your viewers, but I didn't actually want to go into the box."

"So, what you're telling me is: I have unusually high negatives for a third-year husband..."

"Do you want to suddenly decide we need a waffle maker?"

Little Red Riding Carpet

'For the actress who benefitted most by rehab...'

'I'm not taking that money to buy drugs. I'm taking it to pay bribes if I'm caught with my drugs.'

"Or we could raise your profile by coming out with that pimple on the end of your nose."

"What's a nice girl like you doing in a bubble like this?"

You know how Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are known as "Kimye," and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are known as "Branjelina"? I think we should combine "Lance" and "Gloria" into either "Lania" or "Glance." What do you think? I think I won't be needing a menu now, as I'll be busy gagging.

Tom Hanks

Michael Jackson - Mission fulfilled.

"You knew I was hooked when you married me!"

"This is no time for fightin', princess, there's a war on!"

Vanna White: The Later Years.

"How do you love me. Count the ways!"

Toothbrush Romance