Celebrity Humor Fans Gifts

The Elvis nobody wanted to know.

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

'He's the one who needs obedience training!'

"That'll be five bucks."

'A religious zealot denounces a toaster for working on the Sabbath'

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

Two fishermen land on stumps. Man says to other, 'Is that enough structure for ya?!'

"Cat World Domination Day June 24th"

"I can never remember - do these go in garbage or compost?"

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

'No. The television screen hasn't gone red - You've got tomato ketchup all over your glasses!'

Raised by Dogs

'I said you're next, Hibblemeyer. . . Hibblemeyer!'

The First Fire Stick

Stairlift around cliff face.

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

In utero...boy, THOSE were the days!

'We were thinking of naming him after his daddy, but I don't really like the name, Old slap head.'

Divine Desk Bins

'We found you in a cabbage!'

"We have plenty of time to catch the ark."

'Hon, I'm home!'

"Bill did the voice-over for this commercial."

'I was told you two have a love-hate relationship. Care to elaborate on that?'

Tequila Mockingbird

Humans Queue To Use Portable Toilet While Dogs Queue To Use Tree Portable Toilet

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

'NO, it DOESN'T come on DISC!'

Our Founder picture of a caveman: 'We're a very, very old firm.'

Standard & Poor

"He says he's sure this isn't Wildwood. Did you put batteries in the GPS?"

"You want to know why I drink?. . . I drink to forget!"