Celebrity Gawker Pillows

Invasion of Privacy

Prison Celebrity Wing.

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Meanwhile in Hollywood

'Good news. We're not Daft Punk.'

The Life and Times of Miley Cyrus

'No. . . I'll never spend £400 on a haircut. . .'

Leo McKern

JET (Part I)

Hollywood Breakup

How Grandma Sees the Remote

Science Journal. Editor. Ernie, we need a headline that will interest the general public in our artificial supernovas. "Big stars involved in nasty breakups"! (Published originally on March 2, 2009.)

“So let me get this straight: George Clooney isn’t your leader?”

John Stride

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

'Man, I'm age 21 now and so far, I haven't done anything important. Things can't go on like this or I will have to forget my plan to become rich and famous by writing my autobiography at age 35!'

Larry King

Viggo Mortensen

"Dad, has there EVER been a time when James Corden was funny..?"

"Remind me - if I'm no longer a footballer, and you're no longer a celebrity. . . why are we here?"

Morgue - "Welcome to 'Celebrity Autopsy'"

CELEBRITY NEWS TEAM"Now here's Frank Sinatra with the weather."

Meryl Streep

Weditorials

"You played yourself in your last picture. Everyone found it unconvincing."

"Accepting for..."

'I'm a has-been celebrity - get me in there!'

"Come on now answer the question, I want something that can be taken out of context and make the show go viral on twitter."

'We know you are a serious actress..'

'Welcome to Reputation Makeover! Tonight, my team and I will try to repair the tattered reputations of those appearing on other reality shows!'

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

To Get Pardoned by Trump, Become a Celeb

Walken On Clouds

Whoopie Goldberg

'That's right...his appendix...and it's pure dynamite! Don't you see? It'll be the ultimate insider celebrity memoir!'