Cautious Gambler T-Shirts

"Do you mind? I'm reading the prospectus carefully before investing."

"I dunno, looks like a trap."

'He wrote a whole book on how to play a slot machine. I'm anxious for his next one: How to Set an Alarm Clock.'

"Oh, I almost forgot: This time, if you have a good hand, don’t say, 'Meowee!'"

Bob liked getting involved - but not actively involved.

"You might say I'm middle-of-the-road. I'd buy a fur coat but I wouldn't buy a Japanese fur coat."

"I didn't know it was poison ivy. It didn't have any warning labels."

"I think I need a professional money manager. I invest sixty five percent of my money gambling in casinos and thirty five percent I keep under the mattress."

Hang on, don't cross now: I can see a car coming...

'I'll see your dirty laundry, and raise you six children.'

'Will you make the final table?'

'Remember, guys... we've got to clean up this mess before the folks get home.'

"Looks very promising. Put us down for one half of one share."

"On reflection, it might be prudent to leave this one till last..."

A tortoise walks away from a poker game, having lost its shell.

'We're taking baby steps with this whole social media thing until we're certain it pans out.'

"Trevor's nose is running."

"Okay, guys. Don't open your chutes till I give the word."

'Hmmm, this is too good to be true: I can smell a rat...'

'You should try to be more spontaneous.' 'I shall. When I'm good and ready.'

Welcome to Las Vegas - a faith-based community.

'I'll take Tommy Peters to cry first, for a nickel.'

Half a loaf is better than none..

"Ask your doctor if you're strong enough to day trade options."

'As far as we know, no one who has eaten out genetically-modified food has turned into a creature or anything.'

Gymnast on balancing beam about to slip on a banana skin.

Vending machines at work: Snacks, Coffee, Glimmer of Hope

'Mom says if you're going to buy anything online,I'm supposed to make sure it's a secure site.'

'His horse came in at 100 to 1 - last!'

'I used to be really depressed about losing the superlotto, but then I found this support group, and I realized I'm not the only person who hasn't won.'

"Cutting out the middleman."

'Well, that's 3 of my 7-a-day.'

'Sorry you lost 'Silver' at my casino, Kemo Sabe,'

"She wants to make sure we don't lose her money..."

"Judging by the belt and suspenders, I sense you're a risk averse investor."