Catchy Songs Gifts

Will play something to replace that song stuck in your head.

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

"And this song goes out there to any girl who might consider sleeping with me."

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

A Bloody Butcher

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'The Wilsons picked up a quarterback in the off-season. The Riveras picked up a quarterback. The Ludwigs picked up a quaterback...'

"Yes, in the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight, but he snores!"

"Ok, I get it, you're happy and you know it. Now quit clapping."

Trout Game

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

'Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream...'

'I hate to tell you... it's not 'amber waves of gain'.'

"I like a Gershwin tune. How about you?"

"One of these days you're going to throw that thing and I'm not going to bring it back."

"Papi, I don't think I play the guitar very well."

"It's witless, repetitive, and irritating. It's great!"

Playing catch with dog until your arm gives out.

"It's my pet mouse, Elvis. He was caught in a trap."

'It seems your heart replaced the 'Boom-Boom' beat with a funny ringtone!'

"And now, our newest hit song..."

'I like you, you've got balls.'

"...and here's some I made earlier..."

'Boy I hate children: They sing 'Eeny Meeny Miney Mo' and then catch me by the toe...'

'If you want me to mount you 22-pound bass you've got to let go of it.'

The Unfinished Symphony

The Poet and Jingle Laureates' Office.

" I think we have a deal. He goes walking down the street with you as long as you refrain from singing do wah diddy, diddy dum diddy do."

Queen Victoria 'Amused my arse.'

"What's the other half of our brain doing?"