Catching The Irony In Goat Divorces Pillows

"It was ugly, she got custody of the tin cans, chewed tyre and the rusty bike pump... And I got the kids!"

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Billy. The Kid.

Things you don't want to see...(mountain goat falls past climbers).

"I don't remember it ever being this windy before."

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

Vincent Van Goat.

'I'm collecting goat poop for my strawberries.' 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"I like to stay on top of things."

"In the old days, we used to rescue real travellers. Now, we tend to rescue so-called adventurers and thrill-seekers..."

"We’re trying to inject a little pastoralism into our lives."

'Nothing can stop us now, Fred...'

"Don't worry Mum, if there's a storm and lightning, I'll stay safely next to Bob: My teacher said that lightning always hits the highest point..."

First there were virtual-pets. Now there are virtual owners and ranchers.

'Nonsense! They can't All have headaches.'

'Excellent napkin.'

"Yeah, I'll be glad when the baby is born: This is really affecting my balance..."

Mountain Goat sees Mountain Goat Guru at peak.

'Don't worry about the condition of the pitch, I've got my best goat working on it.'

"OK, today, Bob, your team is on blackberry clearing at the Brown's farm, while Lisa, your team is on thistle clearing at the Barker's farm..."

Climbing with a mountain goat.

"I hate to break it to you guys, but it's kinda the same up here as it is down there."

It's 'safety first' for Gary the goat.

It's true what they say: Life at the top can be lonely...

"be-be-be-be"

'Oh, I won't fight you, you're welcome to have them: I can't stand the nagging anymore!'

'You went and ate in the apple orchard, didn't you?'

"Business is booming, so yes, you're hired!"

I lactate, therefore I am.

Don't worry, the first 30 years of working with dairy goats are the hardest.

'Knocked down twice by the same goat.'