Castle Visiting T-Shirts

'Here you go, kid! A worm.'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

Society for the preservation of dragons - "You don't want them to become extinct do you."

"He's his own worst enemy."

"Early model of baggage claim"

"Whosoever slays this dragon may marry the princess."

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"What the hell took so long?"

"This makes Pamplona seem like child's play."

Castle, Cafe + Gift Shop.

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'I'd think you'd be used to having a moat by now.'

In case of emergency - use tin opener...

'This seems like a good time to get rid of some of the king's junk.'

'Sure, real estate prices are sky-high, but kings don't sell their castles, and that's that.'

Who's gone medieval on our ass?

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

'I think they're up to something.'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

'Damn, I knew that disabled access would be our undoing.'

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

"Is 'family' friend of foe?"

'The knights are drawing closer'

"His Excellency the Lord Premier Gooboy."

"We've decided to convert the dungeon into studio apartments, so kill all the prisoners."

Clearing the castle's moat.

Knight sees sign near castle: 'Prince's Parking, All Others Will Be Toad.'