Castle Buff T-Shirts

'A message from the barbarians, sire. They don't want to lay siege. They just want to shoot some hoops.'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

1599: Shakespeare's Agent knew what the public wanted

"What sorcery be this? Thine castle is bouncy!"

Knight Golfing

'How many studio apartment construction projects did you say you'd worked on before?'

"Our focus group will butcher your focus group."

Missing You.

Of Mice and Men.

"To begin with, I would like to express my sincere thanks and deep appreciation for the opportunity to meet with you. While there are still profound differences between us, I think the very fact of my presence here today is a major breakthrough."

"Say! While I'm off in the Holy Land, why don't you find a little crusade of some kind that interests you?"

Dave cut costs and now realizes that in order to pass inspection, he may have to arrange a marriage between his daughter and the building inspector's son.

I want to hold your hand

Man biking with an enormous amount of things on his back.

Knights of the Square Table.

'You can't recuse yourself from a war!'

Showing gardening tools to a tower block.

'The buildings are merging.'

"Never gonna give thou up -- Never gonna let thou down -- Never gonna run around and desert thouuuuuu."

"You fools! That's not the boiling oil, that's my beef casserole!"

'When London Bridge fell down, how much was the contractor sued for?'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

"With a little luck he'll be a benevolent teenager."

"This is the first time you've ever planned a moat, I'm guessing?"

'Ok, we've rented the whole building ... oops, they just put on another floor.'

'I hate to tell you this, but there was a hole in my pocket, and I lost the budget surplus.'

'What ever happened to that persnickety inspector?'

Planner at work.

"I think we can agree that the bridge collapsing is not a good thing."

"Did you have any problems at the design stage?"

Knight Vision

'Best bit of winter pipe lagging I've seen for ages...unfortunately, that's just the scaffolding.'

Secret Family Recipes

Scheduel.