Cast And Giggles Gifts

'You lifted your head.'

"Hey, dad. We wanna play army before we go to bed. Can we have our toy medals back?"

Beware of the Dog Hair.

A baby playing on a grand piano

'I know what you're thinking, are those legal shoes.'

"I might just get a pie."

A mum trying to dry an excited child

'Instead of feeling sorry for yourself, feel sorry for the people who have to work with you.'

"The gods are distributing Chinese menus."

At the baby oil factory.

"Just a heads-up, the Mushroom and Crab Risotto doesn't like its photo taken."

A centi-stampede.

"Chicken on a bend of spinach and onions?"

"This artificial flavouring doesn't taste like artificial flavouring."

"Leave room for sex."

'Oh, sure, the world gets a savior, and what do I get? Hemorrhoids the size of grapefruits!'

'I think I'm beginning to understand what sex is all about.'

Two breasts: No waiting

'If you want me to mount you 22-pound bass you've got to let go of it.'

Beheaded ghost says to spook: 'It's just a trial separation.'

'I guess I get a good deal. I give him the milk and he burps it over dad's shoulder.'

'Waiter? You're in my soup!'

"My bouche was not amused."

"Filet Mignon, medium irradiated."

"Where's the Viagra?!" "Where's the fire escape?!"

"O.K., in three... two... one..."

Breakthrough by a comic

'It says here on your application that you were fired from your receptionist position for refusing to answer phones...well, thanks for applying! Bye now!'

Chez Pretentious Restaurant - All you can pronounce ?25.

'I revel in competition. I have two charities, right now, vying for my $50 donation.'

'We found it washed up on the beach and thought it would make a nice water feature.'

'Daisys squirting-no punch line'

Pogo-stick and the Gardener.

'Back so soon?'

"It's called 'salad,' but it's really just a hunk of raw meat."