Cartoon Comedy Connoisseurs Pillows

'Let's try Chicago or someplace - this town isn't big enough for both of us.'

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

"Unfortunately, once the child contracts Pokémon, he lives with it forever."

"We seem to be spending more on defence than on things to defend"

"Like I could date a guy from Notre Dame."

Assault 'n' Vinegar

Horror movies

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

'Why me Lord?' '...because yo have animal magnetism Noah...'

'Yes, can I help you?'

Ideas Ahead of their Time

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"And that's General Ambrose T. Spangler. He died in the Great Mustache Fire of 1897."

'With all the tanning lotion, sun block and moisturizers, we're more coated with batter than the onion rings!'

Collies Without Borders

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

Men: Hating chick flicks since 1623.

"Recalculating route..."

"Move ten paces, turn, then fire. Ready?" "Dibs on the hat."

Hang on...I've got WINGS..!!!

"Puss in cement boots"

At Ireland's oldst and most respected school of dance, Mrs O'Hara made a terrible discovery... (Book entitled 'The book of Irish dancing vol. 2 - How to incorporate the arms')

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

Noah's life jacket demonstration

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

"Wow! So you think my chronic self-hatred may just be an undiagnosed case of lactose intolerance?"

The last Passenger Pigeon

"No, being declawed is the opposite of being a cyborg!"