Carry-on Aficionado T-Shirts

Carry On Luggage Must Fit In This Box And Not Be Too 'Scruffy Looking'.

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"Trust me, this is as weird for me as it is for you."

Bumper stickers: 'Keep on Truckin''; 'Keep on Trunkin''.

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

"Mom, no raking for me this fall! Got any more leaf bags?"

'HA! This time, I thought of my passport! It's right here, in my jackets' inside-pocket!'

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

'I think you might've over-packed. We'll only be gone for an hour.'

S**t Creek Halt

Planes, Trains, Automobiles, Zeppelins.

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

Baby Carriers

'And here's the crown jewel of the collection. It's an '86, totally organic, and the UK Bag Manufacturers' Association rates it a 99.'

How do fish get to work?

"Which free tote goes best?"

Hackney-Coach Stands

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

"Any bag that can hold all my things becomes too heavy to carry."

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

Bag Lady.

'What did I tell you? - It's time to invent traffic laws.'

The happy union of rail and trucking.

"I'll have a double entendre."

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

Commuter X-Ray

"It's the best bag I've ever had, I can get everything in it."

"We found our luggage in Cabo, but it's way happier there and isn't coming back."

"I was caught by the speed trap several times, then they took away my licence because I was drunk and crashed into five police cars. That was the end of my truck driver career. Luckily I found a new job!"

'Is this the narrow gauge track or a standard gauge track?'

"So that's unanimous Gentlemen. Seatbelts fitted on all our trains"

'You'd never make it as a train driver - how about replacement bus service driver?''