Career Swap Storyteller Pillows

'See! I told you not to switch from hunting to gathering!'

So which rung are you on my corporate ladder?

"This is probably not the time to admit I only joined the force because I figured we'd just be chasing cat burglars."

"You know who's tougher than all your little superheroes? The fossil fuel industry."

"I don't see a destination called 'Veganville' sir."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

'Wait a minute! What if this isn't just a puddle?! What if it's a huge, furious hibernating snowman?'

'If I'd known these programs were going to be so fake - I'd be psychic!'

"The boss says he can remember the day I first started...but nothing after that."

"I see you're an ex televangelist who would like to stay in sales."

That lovely summer day, Little Red Riding Hood decided to deviate from the script.

'For God's sake give me some angst, how will I ever write a misery memoir?'

'How about having at least one character who's alive and wearing clothes?'

'It was a dark and stormy night. Also, there was a Catch-22.'

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

'Then after the pan our third album, we split for musical differences..'

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"Yes, I can use tools, but I realized early on I could earn more money as an accountant..."

The American Tearoom, Moscow

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

Medical student overdrafts...careers in the law.

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"How long have you been working from home, Mr. Farley?"

"Well, if it's a fairy story you want, here's a good one that arrived at the office today."

Mother changing the words to 'this little piggy' to be more healthy

"A homeless person ate my homework."

"It's a coming-of-middle-age story."

'He was a barman before he got into the demolition game.'

"Hang on! - we've possibly go another couple of films left in here!!"

"Start with a Spanish doubloon. Those are always good."

"Any experience?"

"Whoops - I Accidentally Pressed 'Elevator Pitch.'"

'Your resume says you have a B.A. in medieval history, a M.A. in modern art, and a PhD in metaphysical poetry. Have you checked us out on the internet? We design and manufacture detonation switches for drones.'

"Are you sure? It doesn't look like a diet pill!"

Respected Professionals