Career Reflectors Pillows

"You know what I'd like to try someday? Landlubbing."

37 years in the same position.

'I can't believe I didn't get that promotion. So many people have passed me by I feel like a road sign on the highway to success.'

"My career's in shreds, but on the bright side, so are my files."

'I had considered a career as an offshore commodities broker specialising in securitised asset transfers but the pension wasn't as good.'

"When I was a child, I drank like a child, but when I became a man I put away childish drinks."

Maybe it's now time to review our customer care strategy!"

Not much money, glory, or praise

"While you're at it Houdini, try and find the last ten years of my life in there."

'Where do you see yourself in five minutes?'

If I could sell my experience for half of what it cost me I could retire.

"How do you know if you're under the radar or washed up?"

Guys looks in the mirror and sees himself as a prisoner.

"She said that she's against combing marriage with a career....so I quit my job."

Tonight's Lecture: Globalization. I've never worried about my job going overseas --- None of my jobs ever went anywhere.

Do you mind if my mother joins our little business dinner ? You know what it's like, I don't want people from the office to think I'm sleeping my way to the top.

'I'm glad to see you finally pulled in sales. Nevertheless, you're fired. Here, we're dealing with socks and shoes, not with suits and shirts.'

CartoonStock Upload

'I've been thinking about quitting, but it's the only thing that gets me out of the house.'

'And the recruiter from IBM - did you also tell him that at college you mostly sat on a rock by the sea, trying to find yourself?'

'After being here for more than forty years - as undergraduate, graduate student instructor, professor - what saddens me most is that this was not the college of my choice.'

"Tell me again how many young minds I will have shaped by the end of my teaching career."

'No seriously. His final words actually were, 'If I only had spent more time at the office.''

'I am not my job... my job is not me... I do not need my job to give my life a purpose...' 'Hey, did you hear the news? We're all laid off!' 'Stupid affirmations!'

He was a great dodgeball player. Who's in heaven now. He will be missed.

Bowther, Wilkin, Lynch & Fisk

'I'm not saying this is a deadend job, but you can forget a trophy wife.'

"I've lost my mojo."

There, but for the grace of God, go I.

"I feel I blend in well with the holes in my career ladder."

"Where do you see yourself in five years?"

"I'd like your honest, unbiased and possibly career-ending opinion on something."

"The years 1966 through 1995 are blank because I was on tour with the Grateful Dead."

'Of course being on short term contract, I don't enjoy the same benefits as the rest of you.'

HR worker wading through CV's.