Career Pride Aficionado Pillows

'He doesn't like to be called an Optometrist. He prefers the title 'Visionary'!'

Butterfly Woman

Florida - Still Gay as F**k

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

The world's most unemployable family

"Class, this is Mr. Elzondo. He's going to talk about going to college."

"Where do you see yourself five beers from now?"

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'Nice work, kid. Looks like you might be ready to sit up at the big boys' table.'

'Get out there and keep your job!'

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

"Excuse me, Mr Newton, but some of the employees think that your promotion has gone to your head."

God save the Queen.

"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"

Jewish Hall of Nachas

'Of course you can make a great career here! Look at me - when I started working, I was just called 'dude'. Now, only 25 years later, they call me 'MISTER dude'!'

PRIDE!

'Introducing one of our top salesmen despite his old age. . .'

We would have come to you sooner, but he wouldn't ask for directions.

Dexter Flynn, Taxidermy Attorney.

You are more than your job description.

"Do you know what your problem is, Duane? You're too full of yourself!"

'You don't have much of a work history, do you, Mr. Laren?'

'And what do you do for a living Gary?' 'I'm a Puppeteer.'

"...I'm available for interview, at your convenience!"

'Before the meeting starts let's all sing the company song.'

'You're not quite what we had in mind.'

Happy Valentine's Day

"I love my job!"

"We're looking for someone with a diverse skill set accompanied by an advanced sense of passive resignation."

Flunkey asking for a larger salary and not happy to be compared to a lower order of clergy

'I was so busy all my life delivering babies that I forgot to have some of my own...'