Career Marathoner Pillows

"You're doing great, only thirty-one more years to go."

37 years in the same position.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

Storm in the out tray

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

'Your shoe's untied.'

Go! Means NOW!

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Runner collapsing over the finishing line.

"You can either make a pledge or join us in this weekend's Barkathon."

'Our regular programs will not be seen tonight, because our Station Manager is in a 'Three Stooges' mood.'

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

"I told him he should have trained more."

Succession 2

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Blood pressure 210/140. Heart rate 185. Steps taken 29. Sedentary 9.5 hours. Calories burned 19. You da man! Oh, and you're out of pork rinds." "Our classics TV marathon featuring 'Gunsmoke' will continue after..." "The unfitbit"

'Just sitting around letting advertisers brainwash me. What about you?'

"Let's finish off our night of being productive by starting another season."

Binge Watch

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Cross-country runners picking up water and spare batteries.

401K

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

"This is his fifteenth successive Olympics."

"I'd hold off on the peking duck another five minutes...the show's almost over."

Birthday To-Do List

"I watched a Lassie marathon today and realized that I really need to step up my game."

Inactive wear store.