Career Longevity Enthusiast Gifts

'Jake - how long have you been our youth pastor?'

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

The Age of Reptiles. . .

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"It appears that you'll definitely outlive your usefulness."

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"The boss says he can remember the day I first started...but nothing after that."

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

Retired Canadian t shirt guy.

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

"What other skills do you obtain other than being able to answer interview questions?"

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

'Do I remember pre-decimal coinage?I remember pre-Tudor coinage!'

"I said remember those extra years we added to our lives by good clean livin'?"

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

'Thirty years in academia and all I got was this chair.'

'Nice work, kid. Looks like you might be ready to sit up at the big boys' table.'

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'

Midlife: You Are Here.

'Is that the extent of your work experience, court ordered community service?'

'Get out there and keep your job!'

My philosophy ... If you can't beat 'em, outlive 'em.

"Don't knock Florida! Where else can a 73-year old man get a 35-year mortgage?"

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

"What the hell did you do with your day before I retired?"

"Excuse me, Mr Newton, but some of the employees think that your promotion has gone to your head."

"And someday, when you're a little further up the corporate ladder, maybe we'll let you meet J.R. himself!"

'Introducing one of our top salesmen despite his old age. . .'

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"