Career Juggler Gifts

'A career? A life? Isn't that a conflict of interest?'

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

"It just happens...one day you wake up and you find that your best billable hours are behind you."

"I don't have any qualifications, but I do have bags of energy and ethusiasm"

'No, I didn't get the promotion again: It's hard to build a career when you're on Maternity Leave every few months...'

"You've done some outstanding work in Public Relations, Benderman. Unfortunately, you work in Accounting.!

"I'm leaving my job so that I can spend time with another job."

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'We're looking for someone who either has a good background or can concoct a good story about one.'

'We're looking for someone who can multitask - but not during the interview.'

'Brilliant job, Rafferty. Advance two cubicles!'

'I can see you doing very well in this organization, eventually replacing me. So.. you're fired!'

'Let's just say that retiring my practice was a little premature.'

'Yes, I will marry you, Bob. I've decided I'd like having something to fall back on if my career tanks.'

I brought my dog along, to vouch for me.

'Your previous employer hinted that you have a problem with chronic career self-sabotage. What's that all about?' 'Why don't you hire me, dummy, and find out for yourself?'

London merchant telling a young employee that if he does not change his behaviour his career will go badly and he may end up becoming mayor

'I think and work spectacularly well either inside or outside the box.'

'I remember you. Were you laid off from this company last month?'

If you are going to fact check my resume, I embellished the part about being an astronaut.

The slide continued: many of the staff took second jobs

Gentlemen, I'm off to join the circus

'I'm not experienced, but I have a PhD in Byzantine history.'

"I want to be a doctor. But I also want to be an accountant! Maybe I'll be a doctor who does her own taxes."

'So mum's going back to work. Do you have to go too??'

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

'You see, Brad, I'm not just a highly polished career woman.'

'Degree in Psychology and a former Referee. I think your qualified to be a School Bus Driver.'

'Eileen, it says on your resume that you are good at multi-tasking. Can you elaborate on that for me?

Bob gets his walking papers.

'Hello, Ma'am. I'm a college graduate selling vacuum cleaners door to door to help pay for the fortune I borrowed to take a course that had nothing to do with selling vacuums... and how are you doing?'

'If you take this job, you will need child care... that's my second job.'

'During the work gap on my resume, between 2008 and 2012, I was working on my marriage.'

Balancing work and family

"Somehow I'm just not popular. I'm an IRS agent, but I moonlight as a telemarketer and an Uber driver."