Career Experimenter T-Shirts

'If at first you don't succeed, don't plan on moving back home.'

"Young Frankenstein"

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

"Not only pharmaceuticals - we're also finding all sorts of industrial chemicals here."

'I don't like heights...maybe that's why I've had so many low points in my life.'

'Tastes like cherry kool-aid, what's it do?'

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

I'm looking forward tot he day we can afford some real statues for this place.

'My husband made my cake from scratch...even the candles.'

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

"Could you keep still?"

"I don't have my law degree yet but I've got an internship down in cell block 'D'."

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

'Seven layers in one dip? Gentlemen, what have we wrought?'

Sm. Pepperoni & Mushroom Cloud

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"It's been hell since you went into animation."

"Are you looking for metric or imperial sized neck bolts?"

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

Ace headhunters.

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

Planned service changes

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

"This is one of those great jobs you'd be willing to do for free. Will you do it for free?"

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'So, what do you want to be when you grow up: rebel scum or loyal servant of the supreme android republic?'

"Very impressive resume, however you didn't explain why you were tagged and released from your last job."