Career Dynamics Observer T-Shirts

'I remember when I was high right-hand man.'

"This position has become very important to the company."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'AT&T? I'm letting you go. I'm down-sizing too!'

'A depressing thought just came over me. Now we'll have to go out and get a job!'

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

'Bit of a staffing problem, Boss. We haven't got any left.'

"Maybe we should have brought a Riesling."

"You're not the same pupa you were when we first met."

'I give this one about three months...'

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

"It's been hell since you went into animation."

'Why do you want a career in the bank?'

"It's translated from French, so where it says 'Harvard Business School' it may mean 'jail.'"

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

Ace headhunters.

"To make things more democratic, I've decided to introduce a round-table policy."

Planned service changes

"Oh yes, we expect to replace you very soon. After all, the qualifications for the job aren't much."

Become a Cosmetic Surgeon - Raise a Few Eyebrows!

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"Very impressive resume, however you didn't explain why you were tagged and released from your last job."

"This is one of those great jobs you'd be willing to do for free. Will you do it for free?"

'All applicants for employment must first submit to a company physical - We use it to eliminate anyone with a backbone.'

"Missing a call is no excuse for eating your assistant."

'Mom, Dad. I've made up my mind. I'm going to skip college, hire an agent, and pin all my hopes on a professional bass fishing careers.'

'Worker or Soldier: Is that all you can suggest? Not much of a choice is there!...'

'Have you decided who's going to be team leader?'

Multi-Species Employment Agency. Did you hire the octopus for that job opening? Yeah, but I did interview other applicants. The frog was a strong candidate ... I'm flexible on location -- I'm an amphibian! The whale seemed to be hiding something. The gap in my resume? Uh ... I was beached for a while. And the pig wasn't smart. I see "USDA Approved" on your resume --- I don't think you understand what that means. The octopus got the job because he was a great multitasker!

'Please don't be hurt, Dad, but I've decided to go into gathering instead of hunting.'

'You're not the manager I expected.' - 'So blame yourself for having lousy judgement.'

'You seem young, Perkins. Why, I bet I was incarcerated before you were even born.'

"Baldo, I don't care what you are...as long as you're good at it."

'Don't try to use me. I'm not user friendly!'