Career Changer Enthusiast Gifts

Job centre - casual jobs; rotten, insecure low-paid jobs;dull, boring, repetitive jobs; Jobs that no-one in their right mind would consider.

"Actually, I'm hoping what I'm going to be when I grow up hasn't been invented yet."

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

JOIN THE BOY SCOUTS HERE!, ''Trustworthy, friendly, loyal, helpful, kind, courteous, brave, thrifty, obedient and cheerful' -- This is going to look GREAT on my resume!'

"I've given up on the novel. There's more money in writing inspirational memes."

'It could have been worse...she might have chosen banking.'

"Hey, just wanted to say bye again, guys, I'm off to join the circus."

"My wife has always encouraged me... ...to quit this stupid dream and get a real job." ... "You have a wife?"

"I'd like to change my major from dental to mental."

'Hunting and gathering doesn't sound very interesting, so I have decided to become a consultant.'

I'm stepping out to look for a better job...

Planned service changes

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

'Then after the pan our third album, we split for musical differences..'

'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'

"I was doing well in school and planning to be a computer programmer - but somewhere along the way I must have taken a wrong turn."

"Oh yes, we expect to replace you very soon. After all, the qualifications for the job aren't much."

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

"Screw this—I'm going to work for the tabloids."

"Todd was glad he had a support animal."

'Going back to work now that the kids are grown is one thing, Martha. Mounting a hostile takeover bid of my company is another!'

Medical student overdrafts...careers in the law.

"You're kidding! I used to be an economist myself!"

"Originally I wanted to be a stockbroker but found I fainted at the sight of money.''

'Right, I hope that gives you an idea of what the work is about, any questions?'

'Nice work, kid. Looks like you might be ready to sit up at the big boys' table.'

'hard work and more hard work got me where I am today...Not my hard work of course.'

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

'We need someone bright, someone quick to take notice.'

Laid off from a dot-com? Ask about our resume-writing software.

'Get out there and keep your job!'

"I've been promoted from barbarian pillager to management. Do you know how to tie a neck tie?"

"Any experience?"

'I used to be an accountant but I found it too depressing.'