Carbon Crusader Gifts

Climate Change Denier's Playbook

'Just how much carbon are we supposed to offset?'

Carbon Trading

The Environmental Protection Agency cranks it up a notch.

Eco Town 5 miles ahead.

'It's a plaster-cast of my carbon footprint.'

'Look - it's low carbon emission man!'

"Please buddy, can you spare a carbon credit?"

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

'I wonder if everyone else is making as much effort as us to reduce global warming.'

Concept cars and Concept drivers.

The conflict between fossil fuels and climate policy.

Energy performance certificate nailed to wall exhausts employer.

'At this moment, my department is working on a method to burn climate change deniers at the stake without contributing to global warming.'

"Hurray! We've solved global warming!"

Climate Change Hoax

"You want to be cremated!?! Don't you realise how bad your carbon footprint will be?!"

Hourglass earth - time running out

Carbon capture and storage

Net Zero Superstitions

"The government has sent some guidelines as to how er can cut our carbon footprint down..."

Climate Scientists: The End is Here

"We don't have shoes small enough for your carbon footprint."

'He gives off a lot of CO2 playing with that car.'

'My other car is electric. . . honest!'

'Happy birthday, dear -- it's a carbon offset!'

'It's difficult to get passioniate about things you can't pronounce.'

'We got rid of one of our cars, and we hardly ever use the other five ...'

'I'm trying to transmute lead into a combustible fuel that will produce no smoke.' 'Turning it into gold will be easier.'

'We go into business with Al Gore!! We sell our carbon offsets to Mr. Gore's friends. . . And we get paid to stay home!'

I'm polluting for 2.

The Skull of the Earth

Heathrow Protesters - This airport's rubbish!

"When they said they wanted to be saved, I assumed they were talking long term."

Starmer - Just eat less.