Carbon Buster Pillows

Model CO2

Nitrogen Emissions

The Jeopardy of Progress

North Pole

'I never get a good night's sleep. Thank God for these office meetings!'

"Somehow, they get exempted from a lot of laws."

"I'm torn, Randy. I don't know what to think." "About what, little buddy?" "Star Trek. The last movie got rave reviews. Critics and audiences loved it. Therefore, I loved it too. But it didn't come anywhere close to earning $1 billion at the box office. And these days, any movie that doesn't earn $1 billion is a complete failure. Therefore, I must hate it. I'm in limbo until the hive mind comes to a consensus." "Except for honey, nothing good ever comes from hives."

'Doesn't it feel good to be taking care of our planet?'

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

House proud woman vacuums hair from dog.

Joe hasn't been the same since training for that new biathlon--bronco busting and sumo wrestling.

"Well, you know what they say —'The water's always bluer on the other side of the trash fence.'"

Car Emissions

Energy performance certificate nailed to wall exhausts employer.

Stop smoking,instantly.

Oil Spill

'Oh yeah. He's the fastest in the west alright. The fastest out of town, at the first sight of trouble.'

Plastic soup keeps on growing in the oceans.

'Just how much carbon are we supposed to offset?'

'I wonder if everyone else is making as much effort as us to reduce global warming.'

'This has to be the longest course I've ever played!' (Sign with Gas/Food/Lodging Next Tee)

"Where do you come up with your rationalizations for not writing?"

Hourglass earth - time running out

Net Zero Superstitions

"Hurray! We've solved global warming!"

'Happy birthday, dear -- it's a carbon offset!'

"I've decided to sell my vacuum cleaner, because it's just collecting dust."

Climate Change Denier's Playbook

"Aha! - there's a nice spot for a picnic..."

Heathrow Protesters - This airport's rubbish!

"Cough cough"

"When they said they wanted to be saved, I assumed they were talking long term."

Human Dust Buster

"If you really want to experience eternity...try waitin for global agreement on emissions reductions."

Carbon capture and storage