Car-tinkering Time Traveler T-Shirts

Before The Wheel

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

"Meet the scribe"

"I don't care about the rating on Goodreads. We're reading Cinderella!"

Historical memory is on life support.

'That's about it so far, Son.'

"We're following Carrot Top."

"So then, after I'd invented my time machine, I thought: why not go back and visit the good old days?"

Second hand furniture.

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"Desmond likes to live in the moment. . . and that moment happens to be 1960."

"Please! No harmonizing during ululations!"

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"About how if the dark ages never happened we'd be so much more technologically advanced by now."

Time Machine Collision

"Wait... what was it I came up here for?"

Time for vacation, time for work.

'I'd say it's six of one and one half doxen of the other.'

"Early model of baggage claim"

'You know what they say - 'Those who don't learn the lessons of history are doomed to go to summer school.''

"I'm going to prove that Math comes in handy later in life."

Danger Slow Sand.

"This just in... the country has adopted a 24 hr military clock... ...details at 23."

'I used to spring forward. Now all I can do is fall back.'

'When I met him he was all bright and shiny - now he's a rust bucket.'

"It seems like only yesterday that Dad told me I'll be an adult before I know it."

'This new game isn't working out -- the ball keeps running away.'

"I don't know who you are!"

"More quarters! For God's sake, more quarters!!"

'I like the history professor but I think he's mired in the past.'

The power of now