Car Salesman Pillows

"It doesn't matter what you like - according to the demographics, this is the car for you."

"One he gets them in a bear-hug, it's usually a done deal."

"Wheels and an engine? Now you're talking sports package."

"Do you need an anthropomorphic car with a monkey chauffeur in the city? No. Do you want it? Definitely."

"I no longer worry about my new car getting dinged in the parking lot."

'I'll be honest, this car is way overpriced, gets horrible mileage, and smells exactly like steamed broccoli. . . it does have dual climate control though!'

'I'll even throw in 30 days free towing.'

'I don't think I have enough green to buy a green vehicle.'

"Nope, no airbags. But did I mention the heavy-duty seatbelts?"

'A word in your ear about the 'value for money' fleet cars you ordered...'

All you'd expect in a British car!

"I agree, it's a lot of bang for the buck. And thumping, whining, clicking, clacking, clanging, grinding, buzzing and rattling."

'Well, if you're looking for fuel economy...'

'All our vehicles come with a 24-hour, round-the-block guarantee.'

'Did I mention the gas mileage?!'

'I'm sorry. The possibility that you may have won $10 million in the sweepstakes won't do as collateral.'

'It's four years old and every time I got a letter of recall, I removed that part and sent it to the factory.'

'Dad, can we get a Porche convertible?'

'That'll be $327.93 for parts, $268.58 for labor and $50 because I didn't like the station you had your radio set to.'

'Our auto leasing contract is being recalled to correct a defect in the wording. It's not vague enough.'

"Oh, you misunderstood. The cars aren't half priced...the balloons are!"

'Just came in. It's a repo.'

'Thats with $30,000 down.'

'The dealer says the warranty is good for the life of the car but he's not responsible if the vehicle doesn't live very long.'

'It seats two comfortably.'

'I meant, how flexible are you on price?'

'I wish I could accept your offer but I really wanted to sell the whole car.'

Vehicle Sales.

It was owned by a little old lady who could make a decision faster than you.

'They've really advanced car software.'

'With the sleep, low x-39, you get a free list of local chiropractors.'

'Dickson, how many times do I have to tell you, don't start out with the price!'

'If you lose your electrical charge before you get to a recharge, you just wind this.'

"This electric car is environmentally friendly and will bring your family closer together."

'I want a 'green' car colored red that keeps me in the black.'