Car Owner T-Shirts

"At first, I thought it was gunfire."

"Next time your engine knocks, answer it."

'That was fun!'

Dog Walking Services

"What's wrong, boy? Is Timmy stuck in the well? Are zombies at your doggy door? A fire? Squirrels are holding your bone hostage? My Spotify stock just tanked?..." "He thinks he's real funny."

"There's really not much to obedience school. Just listen up and do what they say."

Love a Mutt

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

"There's something about ripping the stuffing out of a toy that turns me into a wild dog. I'm afraid I actually like that feeling."

"I've tasted better myself, but you've got to admit the service is good."

'Why Sally, you look so fetching with that stick!'

'Yes I know I'm intelligent and famous, but I'd trade it all for a good old belly scratching.'

"I see you've security marked your property."

'When he comes through that door, let's all jump up and give him a big kiss!'

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

"Looks like a pretty quiet night out there, huh, girl?"

"The bad news is that I backed into a fan. The good news is my owner's a plumber."

Dogs life

"He sits there all day waiting to chase the email man."

"Who's a good boy? You're a good boy."

'...and remember, son, never throw up on an old carpet...wait until they get a new one!'

Epic Battles

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

Dog Obedience School: 'I think we're going to have our work cut out with this one.'

'Brrr - It is cold out, isn't it fella!?!'

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"I'm excited to get fixed at the vet, had no idea I was broken."

Halo Frisbee.

"It makes me want to pee."