Capital Enthusiast Gifts

"I can't sleep. I just got this incredible craving for capital."

'In today's stocks... small caps rose on news big company stocks fell...'

'Always bought low.'

'Now that I have your attention...'

"Tariffs love me...tariffs love me not..."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

Large Dollar Sign Office Block

Profit

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

Businessmen trying to prop up a line-chart with sticks

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

'If he knows so much about stocks and shares, how come he still has to work?'

"DeepSeek" "Stargate"

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

Entering the Business Community: Assets/Liabilities

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

"I'm from brokers without borders. Invest in deserted island reits!"

"Do you promise to love, honour and contribute to the gross national product?"

"The economy always seems to be recovering, but it never recovers."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'Wavering between being bullish or bearish'

'Investment charts can be complicated, son, but that usually means, 'bonuses'.'

'The good news is, we did as well as expected last quarter. The bad news is, we didn't expect to do too well.'

'Today the stock market was moribund, as growth equities sputtered and bonds dipped due to the inverted yield curve. I'd translate that into layman's terms...but they don't pay me enough.'

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

Fiscal cliff - US dollar falling over the edge.

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Okay, money doesn't make you happy. So how about commodity futures?"

Wall Street Couch

'He's downgrading the credit agencies.'

"Basically, your new job here at the Treasury Department implementing the bailout is simple, Grayson, just grab and armful of money and run..."

G7 Summit Concern

Day trading.