Cap And Gown Comedian Pillows

"1-1"

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000... Congratulations, and thanks for the $86,000...

"Graduation day at kite flying school."

"I see here that you are a recent graduate."

Graduate

Zumma Cum Laude

"We've known each other for years Bob, and this grooming style suited you when you were young, but it's time to let it go!"

'Yes, my opinion today is the opposite of what I said yesterday. In my position, this is called 'flexibility', in your position, it would be called 'unreability''.

"The best part is, for me history is now history!"

Unsuitable clothing.

Graduate

Graduate of 2021

Circus trousers

"What does he know, and how long will he know it?"

'It's hard to look intimidating with this feather thing going on.'

Graduate.

'He's in a meeting. Would you like to speak to his assistant?'

Some New Mortarboard Styles.

Resumes

"I didn't know you had a minor."

'You got haberdashed!'

"Well, I've been a hot dog, pizza slice, cheeseburger, and popcorn bucket, but no, I don't have any burrito experience."

Graduation.

'Congratulations, your days of avoiding the real world are finally over.'

Bob wondered why his odds had rocketed to 100-1.

Graduate Joins the Unemployment Queue.

"You're not really getting this whole mask thing, are you, Bob?"

'The captain yelled women and children first.'

"Adopting an Elvis wig and dusting off your old demob suit, isn't going to help dad!"

'Why do you carry your electronics in a fancy case, but your clothes in a paper bag?'