Canteen Comedians Pillows

Cafe Burns.

Emotion of Mr. Kenwigs on hearing the family news from Nicholas

'I don't remember this canoe being this heavy, do you Tom?'

"Here's our little bundle of joy."

"Oh look—he fell asleep when you told me about your day."

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

'Think about it guys: We're fed and sheltered, why would we ever think about leaving the nest?'

'We like bright, new employees who aren't afraid to take some risks. By the way... how are those clam fritters?'

'Chili again?'

Their father would frequently have to barge in and pantomime to his kids that they were not being quiet enough as they pantomimed actual noisy children.

"Can I have another free biscuit for my dog?" "Sure." "Can you warm this one up? Maybe sprinkle some cinnamon and sugar on it, and maybe make it three biscuits?" "You sure this is for your dog?" "Can you also sprinkle a little turkey on it?"

"It said on the packet the pasta should act as a vehicle for the sauce."

"I'm looking forward to the next thirty five years of her living with us."

"We're neither software nor hardware. We're your parents."

'Do you think Mum and Dad are trying to keep an eye on us, by enroling on the same university course as us, Colin?'

'You made me jump,'

"My parents are members of a tiny cult that worships me."

"I followed the money and it led me to Edgar."

"Our little girl has blossomed into quite the little complainer."

'A beaver wearing a mountie hat riding a moose! Still think we haven't crossed into Canada?'

'Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday you like beans, now you don't like beans.'

Schoolgirl in canteen: 'The food's great but I wish they'd stop calling it 'pukka tukka'.'

'Don't chew your food.'

"So, what are you doing for the rest of your life?..."

"Yes, I can see the excitement in Young Master's eyes and I can smell fear in Master and Mistress: looks like the school holidays are coming..."

Baby thinks: I smile, they smile. I laugh, they laugh. I think they're teachable!

"I want you both to know that I'm unhappy about the way things are run around here, and there are going to be some changes made..."

"Drat!. . . We've run out of ice..."

"I guess we'd be considered a family. We're living together, we love each other, and we haven't eaten the children yet."

"You have your emotional support animal and I have mine."